Meghan Markle’s whirlwind romance is the opposite of Kate Middleton’s 10-year courtship — and it shows how different their marriages will be
Ever since Prince Harry announced his engagement to Meghan Markle, people have not stopped comparing her to Prince William’s wife and her sister-in-law-to-be, Kate Middleton.
Prince Harry’s short courtship with Meghan and Prince William’s very long courtship with Kate Middleton is the subject of recent comparison.
Prince Harry met Markle in 2016 and by November 2017 they were engaged. They were already both in their 30s when they met. However, Prince William and Kate Middleton met in college and didn’t get engaged until 2010, five years after they graduated. They were still very young when they met and grew into adulthood together. It is believed that these factors will play a part in their marriages and shows how different both marriages will be.
Business Insider asked two relationship experts to explain what these differences might mean for the two marriages, and for the two women’s lives. Andrea Syrtash is the author of “He’s Just Not Your Type (And That’s a Good Thing): How to Find Love Where You Least Expect It” and the founder of Pregnantish.com. Rachel Sussman is a relationship therapist in New York City.
There’s no saying what will transpire over the course of either relationship. But as Sussman said, “When you’re aware of potential pitfalls, you can really work on the relationship and try to make sure that those don’t happen.”
Prince William and Middleton have built a life together, having known each other since college. “What’s wonderful is that they have a history,” Syrtash said.
“They know so much about each other,” Sussman said of couples who met when they were young. “They have a lot of the same friends. They have shared cultural references and memories.”
Prince Harry and Markle, on the other hand, met in their 30s, meaning they brought more wisdom and self-knowledge to their relationship. Especially Markle who has been married before.
“Our early and mid-20s are a time of discovery, not only of who we are and what we want, but who we want to be with. It’s good to evolve into that. I think it’s a positive sign that Harry and Meghan had experience on their side,” Syrtash said.
“Usually in your 30s you know what you like; you know what you don’t like,” Sussman said.
For the potential downsides, Prince William and Middleton may potentially grow apart, Sussman said. “Sometimes someone will feel that they’ve matured more or they’re growing apart or that one is changing and the other one is the same.”
Meanwhile, Prince Harry and Markle may have a hard time relinquishing some of their independence. “You’re more set in your ways by the time you’re in your 30s,” Sussman said. “You’ve been dating [other people] and living independently for 15 years already. It might not be as easy to set up house. It might not be as easy to share expenses and to have financial disclosure.”
Syrtash pointed out that if Prince Harry and Markle do want to have children, fertility may or may not be an issue. “William and kate probably didn’t have that on their minds,” she said.
Prince Harry and Markle may also have less time to enjoy together before they have children. It can be nice to have that foundation, Sussman said, so that when a baby comes and things get stressful, the couple can say, “we can pull through this.”