Dwayne Kelndorfer knew something was wrong when he could no longer sleep.
He chased rest but his mind kept spinning.
For three harvests, his crops had been snowed under.
Ugly fault lines had opened in his marriage and long days working his fourth generation farm south of Killam, Alta. had him running on fumes.
With hundreds of cows and 2,000 acres of crop to tend, the work was relentless. The father of three felt alone and overwhelmed.
“It just snowballed and I guess I went off,” he said.
Kelndorfer suffered a psychotic break.
“You’re supposed to be tough and strong,” he recalled. “But everybody has a breaking point and you don’t know what’s going to break you.”
Kelndorfer’s story is not an uncommon one. It echoes the findings of new research from the University of Alberta exploring threats to the mental health of farmers and the industry’s elevated risk of suicide.
The comprehensive review examines the results of 14 previous studies and sheds light on the shared risk factors — and common sources of hope — for farmers who are struggling.
The peer-reviewed studies come from across Canada, the United States, the United Kingdom, Australia and India and were based largely on interviews with surviving family members of farmers who had died.
Lead researcher Rebecca Purc-Stephenson, a psychology professor at the University of Alberta’s Augustana Campus, said the mental crisis has been unfolding for years but that she wanted to go beyond basic death statistics and create a portrait of who these farmers were.
“If we can understand who that person is, it makes it easier for us to then create interventions to help prevent [suicides]” said Purc-Stephenson, who is also the current lead researcher with AgKnow, a non-profit mental health initiative for farmers and others in agriculture.
Based on their findings, Purc-Stephenson and her team developed an analytic tool called the Farming Adversity-Resilience Management (FARM) framework, which maps how risk factors intertwine and provides direction for future research and improved prevention measures.
She said she felt compelled to launch the review after a national study from the University of Guelph polled 1,000 Canadian farmers and found that 57 per cent met the criteria for anxiety, 34 per cent for depression, and 62 per cent experienced psychological distress.
Among the risk factors identified in the study, two were especially prominent: the unpredictable financial risks of farming and the pull many farmers feel to maintain their identities.
The nature of agriculture is risky and leaves the livelihoods of farmers vulnerable, either to the weather or whims of market forces beyond their control.
Consecutive years of poor crop yields, livestock epidemics or unexpected equipment breakdowns can deliver unexpected financial blows that leave many feeling trapped, Purc-Stephenson said.
And it’s more than a financial problem. It is often a question of legacy, she said.
Coping capacity
Farmers who died by suicide were often described as having a deep connection to their farm and could not see themselves in any other occupation, Purc-Stephenson said.
When faced with setbacks, farmers felt ashamed that they had failed when previous generations had succeeded and blamed themselves if they could not pass on the family legacy.
Purc-Stephenson said many of the farmers who died, particularly men, were described as hard-working, strong, private people who took great pride in being the stoic breadwinners of their families.
Stoicism and the pressure to succeed can be a dangerous combination, she said.
“The stress that is involved with farming, it builds up so slowly to a point where it just completely overwhelms your capacity to cope,” she said.
“Because these are things that have historically not been discussed in agriculture or in rural communities, it really goes unnoticed.”
Other contributing factors include community and family dynamics. When the farm was failing, farmers could come to view themselves as a burden to their families. And the small, tight knit communities in which they live made many farmers feel watched and judged.
“You’re living in a fishbowl,” she said. “While they appreciated their neighbours … they were also aware that everyone knew their business.”
Seeds of hope
Despite the challenges, the study found “protective factors” that can make farmers more resilient in the face of hardship.
Purc-Stephenson said family and community support as well as reducing stigma are all key.
She said greater access to health care in rural areas, including counselling services tailored to farmers, should also be a priority.
Kelndorfer agrees.
Five years since his mental health crisis, he looks back at those dark days with a sense of gratitude.
He was admitted to care in Ponoka, Alta. as his neighbours and children stepped up to keep his farm running. The 52-year-old said the weeks he spent in treatment were the best remedy, along with the continued support of his friends and children.
He still has a hard time staying idle but his mind is easier now. He’s thankful that he’s still here to pass the farm onto his son.
Kelndorfer shares his story in the hopes it will encourage others to seek help.
“It’s easy when you’re depressed to get holed up in your house and stay away from people. It doesn’t get better that way … But if we can talk about it, we can get help.
“This big burley rancher who lives close to came up to me and he said, ‘What you did gave me the courage to go see the doctor.’
“And that’s pretty impactful. Maybe we can change.”
If you or someone you know is struggling, here’s where to get help: